Alternatives for the word ‘F-U-C-K’

Posted by: laughlikepontianak on: 28 May, 2008

• In: Funnies | General Ramblings
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Before I expound on my new-found discovery of alternatives for this infamous word, let us try to consider the origin of the word ‘FUCK’ and how it came to have such a bad reputation.

Some sources say that ‘FUCK’ is actually an acronym.
F = fornication… (meaning ‘to have sex’)
U = under
C = consent of the
K = king
FUCK was created during a dictatorship ruling in medieval England. People living in that short ridiculous period had to get permission from the crazy king before they could have sex. Since human nature is such that it inclines towards laziness, people started to pronounce the acronym instead of verbalising the whole phrase.

Some say that FUCK = For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge… an acronymic phrase given to sex offenders. Some others say that it originates from a few European languages. If you want to read a more comprehensive discussion of this, go to this link: http://www.snopes.com/language/acronyms/fuck.asp

Conclusion of the discussion: NOBODY CAN REMEMBER! So, who gives a fuck.

Anyhow, FUCK has a very bad reputation now. It is used as a swear word to insult and express extreme anger or frustration. Used with other words, FUCK gains depth in meaning and usage.

Personally, I think there is no better word!

For those of you who agree with me, but find it sometimes inconvenient to express this word in public, fret no more! You can still curse away with the same ferocity without being “offensive.”

Here is a list of verbs and nouns to cover up FUCK:
1) intercourse
2) coitus
3) penetration/penetrate
4) fornication/fornicate
5) tup – used in Shakespearen plays; crude word for animals mating
6) copulation/copulate

Examples:
1) Well, I don’t give an intercourse about what you think.
2) Coitus! Coitus! I forgot my keys!
3) Get the penetration out of my sight! Penetrate off!
4) Don’t take me for a fool. Stop fornicating with my mind.
5) Look at that tupping idiot. I hate that mother-tupper.
6) What the copulation do you think you’re doing?!

If you find 2-syllable or 3-syllable words a challenge for your poor tongue, here’s another option – ‘puck’. Camouflage FUCK with the letter ‘p’.
Example: That guy is such a pucker. He thinks he can just puck around without being caught.

Okay, that’s all for today, boys and girls. Happy pucking, intercourse-ing, coitus-ing, penetrating, copulating, fornicating and tupping, for life is short and the years don’t wait.

Tags: alternatives, fuck, words